I Don't Know Yet

You would think by now

I would know what to say

And what to do

I seem so competent

And yet, there are no answers

To the questions that I'm told

Like why do people grow so old?

How come we fail and illness grows

Unstoppable in those who in their prime

Were so unstoppable themselves?

And why is it when you're growing old

There's this face that stares at you

When you brush your teeth and put on makeup

Some say looks ridiculous and yet

You know that others said so long ago

Made you look beautiful

Or was it just the music and the drink?

What makes small babies grow into men

Who have burdens bigger than their souls

And who says women become boring

When diapers and school pictures are we're told

All they think about

They don't, oh lord, I hope

Don't you see the handsome man

The gorgeous girl

When you see the looking glass?

Haven't you heard the voices

Of years ago

Still laughing at your silly jokes

And boasting to the world

How much they're going to change it

And the glimmer of the eye

Of the one who sat beside you hoping

Perhaps you were the one

I don't know yet.

All I know is

That being you is the best you can ever be

That beauty lives in music and in poetry

That children are your greatest love

And the very ones who can truly break your heart

That our seniors are ourselves tomorrow

Who still dance with fury in their dreams

And curse the pains that ache them in the day

And say, if I could do it over again,

But change a thing? Would they?

How times have changed

Have they?

A hug, a simple word of faith

A cheerful voice on the telephone

A simple gesture

A word of praise

They're still the same, as always

Fodder for a growing soul

We're always growing

What direction does it take?

Bitter, happy, gentle, kind

Cheerful, sadly, simply

Lovingly, hatefully

It's up to you

Why is the sky blue

That I know

The rest, forgive me

I simply just

Don't know yet.

©C. M. Harris Davies, 28/9/99